I just came home from a lovely evening and I will make another post. This time it is a quite personal post but I am a very open person so it is ok. As you know I had a lovely evening with my friends tonight and I had such a delicious meal. There is only one problem.. My ex was constantly texting me through out the evening.
You see he is rubberband man. He comes and he goes and gives nothing but wants everything. And I had a choice to either like the situation or say: “No, I will not have it like this anymore”. We broke up 1 year ago and he has been coming back and leaving several times during this whole year. There have been lies about relationships etc.
Yesterday I informed him that since there haven’t been any initiative from his side to make any plans, I had accepted the invitation from my friends. That wasn’t appreciated but I told him off and tried to turn my bad mood into a better one and I succeeded. 🙂
Today when I was just about ready to leave he came knocking on my door expecting me to be available to him. Well you can imagine his surprised face when I said: “Sorry I gotta run!” and just walked out and locked the door. He left without a word.
Then later on when I asked him why he had come he said that we where together and that he expected us to be together this evening. This was all news to me and even if I love him a lot I felt that this wasn’t right. I could feel where this was heading so I asked him to do something he never done before. I said to him that if he is serious about me then add me on facebook and change the relationship status into; in a relationship with me.
This is something he has never done before even when we where living together.
You see I don’t trust that he is single for one bit since he has lied about it before. Guess what, he said no. I said that is totally fine for me. But then you also have to accept that I don’t want you in my life. And here we are..
So why am I telling you all of this? I was about to say yes but then I stopped and listened to myself.. If I say ok then I am doing what I always have done and I will get the same result over and over again. I don’t want that. I deserve better and I want someone who treats me just as good as I deserve. I don’t want to be with someone who just wants me so that no one else cannot have me. I simply refuse to do that. I want more, I want it all!
So the lesson is: Never settle for less than you deserve no matter what because trust me, there are far more worse things than being alone. I actually quite enjoy it until the right man comes along. 🙂